It’s that magical time of year where the giant corporate monster, known as the TV industry whores itself out to the giant corporate wildabeast, the advertising industry. The point of all this is for the TV networks to get as much upfront cash as they can before advertisers actually see how crappy all the shows are - a beautiful game of slight of hand. Usually, this is when the networks make their big announcements as they try and position themselves as the next hottest channel.
As of now, these are the Wall Street predictions via Deadline.com: Credit Suisse’ Spencer Wang predicts this morning that CBS will record commitments (advertising dollars) of $2.8B (+4%), followed by ABC at $2.4B (+2%), Fox at $2.0B (+2%), NBC at $1.7B (no change), and CW at $477M (-1%).
Most of this boring insider stuff is more effective for sleep than an ambien and a glass of wine, so I’ll just mention other cool stuff in network news:
* Television ratings are falling everywhere, and with the economy still hovering around toilet level, advertisers won’t be spending the big bucks on TV advertising at the moment.
* ABC renewed Modern Family and Happy Endings. Yeah for both of those, which are just be getting better and better.
* NBC renewed 30 Rock for a 7th and final season. I need to pause for a moment and shed a tear. Okay I’m back. Tina Fey put an amazing show together with her stellar writing as the foundation. NBC also renewed Up all Night, and Parks and Recreation to my delight - although there are rumors that there will only be one more season of Parks which makes me extremely angry. There’s so much they can still do with those characters. For some reason, NBC also renewed Community and Whitney. Whitney is just not funny, and while Community has rabid fans, it seems like only a good sitcom if you are on coke. It is so bipolar and inconsistent, like its bipolar coked up creator Dan Harmon. Harmon also went overboard in his fight with Chevy Chase recently and has lost my respect completely. You don’t talk about one of the Three Amigos like that dude.
* Fox renewed New Girl. It had no other choice for this charming breakout hit. Zooey Deschanel could not be any more adorable. Well she could, but it would probably be illegal in most southern states.
Think that’s about it on fun TV news for now. I am going to make some hot tea, cry and read over some old 30 Rock Scripts. I am going to miss you Kenneth Parcell.